Tag: names

Four full moons – a haiku series

Daily writing prompt
What are you doing this evening?
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Tonight is the season opener of Naked Angels Tuesdays@9 Chicago and I’m excited! We’ve been off since May and have had four full moons since our last show. For every full moon, I wrote a haiku.

I always give Tuesdays@9 my “all” so by the end of every season, even though I am proud and grateful, I’m also thoroughly exhausted. Here’s the haiku I wrote on the May 23 full moon:

don't howl at the moon
when she's full -- she needs quiet
give her space

But after a couple weeks of recuperating, I was ready to be vulnerable and creative again. Here’s the haiku I wrote the night of the June 21 full moon. 

the moon shows herself
fully once a month
i must do the same

In July, I focused on understanding the wild yet reliable nature of creativity. I wrote this haiku on the night of the July 21 full moon.

creativity 
is the moon and the moon is
creativity

That haiku is more of a mantra than a poem but at least it reminds me that my creativity — like the moon — is always there, waxing and waning, and part of something much bigger.

***

In August, I took at solo writing trip to Boston. Even though I have TSA Precheck, I was frisked at O’Hare security because the username on my phone’s flight app said “Connie” and my full name is “Constance.” As she patted me down, the agent told me, “The names have to match.”

Later, I arrived at my hotel in Boston.

“Hello. May I help you?”

“Hi! I’m here to check in. My name is Connie Kuntz.”

With absurd and short-lived glee, I slid my drivers license across the counter. I was ecstatic to be in Boston.

The concierge proceeded to look up my reservation.

With a troubled look on her face, she repeatedly looked at me, my ID and her computer screen. After a minute or two, she picked up her phone and called for backup. A woman came out from the back. As she walked to the counter, she made direct eye contact with me. I’m not sure why, but she scared the shit out of me.

Actually, I do know why. Several years ago I read Heads in Beds, a tell-all memoir about the hotel industry that convinced me that everyone in the hotel industry is a coke-head who hates their “guests.”

Anyway, when she arrived at the counter, she looked at her colleague’s computer screen, then at me, then at my ID, and finally muttered, “‘Connie’ is a nickname for ‘Constance.'”

The concierge looked at me and earnestly asked, “So what should I call you?”

I panicked and said, “Uhhhh….Constance?”

It didn’t feel right. First of all, I have successfully avoided saying “uh” for years. I was pissed at myself for breaking my “no ‘uh’ streak.” On top of that, I wanted to apologize to them and ask for forgiveness. I’ve felt silly about my name my whole life and suddenly found myself wondering why.

There’s nothing wrong with Constance but it does take up a little more space. Why is it so hard for me to make space for my own name?

On the night of the August 19 full moon, I decided it was time to fully embrace Constance so I wrote this haiku.

as the river flows
into the ocean, Connie
flows into Constance

So there you have it. Four haiku poems for the four full moons since Tuesdays@9 broke for the summer. And now you know what my plans are for tonight!

***

For the record, Constance is a work in progress. I still feel a surge of embarrassment and shame whenever someone calls me Constance but at the same time I also realize I am simply trying to flow into myself, into my truth. It’s not that radical a concept and I should have done this years ago. Right?

Thanks for reading. -Constance

Nice round letters

Bloganuary writing prompt
Write about your first name: its meaning, significance, etymology, etc.
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My first name might be “Baby.”

Many mothers, fathers and families say something along the lines of “Hi Baby!” to a baby long before it’s officially named or born. There are countless videos, tv shows and films that suggest this.

Example 1: The dad gently puts his ear to to his pregnant wife’s belly. He smiles with wonder and pulls away for a second. Then he’ll speak directly to the belly. “Hi Baby,” he says.

Example 2: Sometimes a toddler-aged big sister or big brother will pat the mother’s belly and sweetly say, “Baby.”‘

Example 3: At prenatal checkups, nurses, doctors and ultrasound technicians sometimes ask, “How’s Baby?”

***

“Baby” has Old English origins. Some argue that “baby” is imitative of the first words babies say: “Ba ba ba ba ba.”

Others argue that babies are gifts from heaven and that’s that.

People — and this is new information — are opinionated about babies.

***

My second name is Constance. My friends call me Connie.

Constance means steadfast and reliable. Connie means knowledgeable. I do my best.

***

When I was in high school my friend Raymond told me I should go by Constance.

“‘Connie’ sounds like a secretary’s name,” he said with disgust.

***

When I worked at Marshalls, my friend Andy used to call me Constance whenever my mood swung from cheerful to pissed.

“Constance is here,” she’d say. “Look out.”

***

When I worked at a Bruegger’s Bagel Bakery, a new hire asked me my name.

“Connie Ross,” I told her.

“Hmmm,” she said. “Nice round letters.”

I remember panicking a little shortly before I got married because “Connie Kuntz” doesn’t have nice round letters.

***

I’m sorry to say I do not remember the name of the gal who said my name had nice round letters. I am disappointed in myself. I should at least be able to remember if her letters were pointy.

I will say this: Many wonderful people have drifted into my life and improved it in nice, round ways. Life is amazing that way.

Thanks for reading. -Connie Kuntz (round and sharp letters)

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