Tag: blogging

Riled up

I once saw a solo show written and performed by man who spent more than 20 years of his life in prison.

I marveled at how confident he was in front of the audience. Most of us in “the theatuh”* go through years of education, formal training, and trust-building exercises to achieve such ease. With zero formal education, he carefully guided us into his carceral experience. It was impactful!

Excellent storytelling aside, the fact remains that this man, like millions of Americans, was overcharged and lost several years of freedom and safety in a thoroughly unjust justice system.

When I got home, I was fired up. I told my husband I was never going to vote again because Democrats and Republicans are responsible for our horrendous prison system.

“How the hell can I vote in a system that’s so broken?” I asked. “And why the hell isn’t prison reform our number one political issue!?”

I threatened to “go Libertarian” and proclaimed it was “high time we live off the grid!”

Spoiler: I still vote, I’m still a registered Democrat, and I still prefer cities and convenience to rural settings.

Storytelling…it riles me up.

Some more personal theatrical, cinematic, and literary history

In 2002, I saw a play about convicted serial killer Aileen Wuornos. She was a prostitute who shot seven of her johns to death in 1989 and 1990. At the time of the play, Wuornos was on death row for the murders. After learning about the rape, abuse, and humiliation she endured in her young life, I left the theater angry that she was the one in jail awaiting execution.

Theatre…it riles me up.

A few months later, Wuornos was executed by lethal injection. About a year after that, a film about her (starring Charlize Theron) was playing in most cinemas across the United States. The movie wasn’t as good as the play (they never are) but millions of people like me were outraged at the unfairness of it all. However, it wasn’t until I started writing this blog post that I realized that Theron and other folks in the movie-making industry made millions from Wuornos’s tragic life.

Exploitation…it riles me up.

***

Approximately 14 years ago, before it was a Netflix series, I read Piper Kerman’s book Orange is the New Black. It was upsetting, yes, but also insightful and even inspirational because there was a long list of resources for women prisoners at the end of the book. I was so moved that I dressed up as Kerman at a local “Come Dressed as a Literary Character or Author” event.

Me as author Piper Kerman. Look at that snatched waist!

A few years after I read the book, I watched the series. I was once again outraged and disturbed by the injustices each “inmate” endured. And today, as I write this, I am just now realizing how Netflix and the television industry has profited from the stories of the overcharged, wrongly charged, and wrongfully executed. The overcharged, wrongly charged, and wrongfully executed have not profited one cent and the prisons have not been reformed! Am I riled up? Yes. But…

A little personal history and personal hypocrisy

A few years ago, three completely separate then-friends of mine — people I had invited into my home — went to prison for crimes involving children. Though my family and I were unharmed by them, it was a very disturbing and shocking slew of events.

Betrayal…it riles me up!

And betrayal scares me. What else were they capable of? I suddenly stopped caring about prison reform. I wanted them to go away forever and never again come near my family.

Am I a hypocrite for cutting them out of my life? Or was I forced to make clear boundaries in order to protect my family? Or a little of both? Or a little of both and something else? Jesus hung with prisoners. Hell, he was a prisoner. He was crucified as a prisoner alongside prisoners.

Should I have supported my “friends?”

WWJD?

I did WAMWD. What any mother would do. Cut them off.

A little political history and political hypocrisy

Republican nominee and twice-impeached former president Donald Trump, the biggest hypocrite this country has ever seen, was recently convicted of 34 felonies. It’s unlikely he’ll serve even one minute for his crimes. If anything, the conviction has only endeared him to his base. They’ll vote for him on November 5 and Trump will vote for himself.

If he wins, we’ll have four years of mind-numbing rhetoric.

If he loses, will he incite another riot? Will another police officer die? Will more Americans die while the “normal grandpa” kicks back at home?

To think I once said I’d never vote again is beyond pathetic and ironic, but I felt that way. I did. Hypocrisy, change, and the human condition will always blur the lines of my personal politics. But I will not let that stop me from voting blue, and only blue.

Where we are now

I audibly gasped when Biden announced he would not be seeking re-election. I was on my laptop and immediately slapped it shut.

“What’s wrong?” my husband asked.

“I don’t even want to talk about it,” I said. “I’m too pissed.”

“Just tell me.”

“Guess.”

“Biden dropped out.”

I nodded my head and sobbed.

Politics…they rile me up.

Fandom or Fan Dumb?

It took me a couple days to deal with my Biden grief. I knew I would support Kamala but at first I wanted to hear who her running mate would be and I wanted to wait for the official nomination at the Democratic National Convention. For a hot minute, I half-wondered if Illinois Governor JB Pritzker was going to run. But once President Biden addressed the nation, I felt better. He has that affect on many people, not just me. His resounding praise and endorsement of Kamala Harris made sense and I decided I was all in, even before the DNC.

It may be a dumb way to put it, but I’ve been a Biden “fan” for a long time. Among many things, I love the president’s compassion and that he created a cabinet that actually looks like America. I love that he brought Amanda Gorman to his inauguration. I instantly became a fan of the national youth poet laureate before she uttered one word of her poem. When she clearly enunciated, “Mr. President, Dr. Biden, Madame Vice President, Mr. Emhoff, Americans, and the world” in her greeting, I knew I had to pull my car over and just listen. And when she recited her poem, “The Hill We Climb” I sat there in my car speechless, dumb with hope. Only Biden could give us that moment.

***

I’ve been a Kamala fan ever since she showed up on my political radar in 2019. She’s sharp, tough, and experienced.

Before becoming the vice president, Harris has served as senator, prosecutor, and attorney general. I don’t agree with every move she makes; her record as a prosecutor and attorney general conflicts with what I say I want for prison reform, but she said she has a unique plan to end the war in Gaza.

“The war in Gaza is not a binary issue,” she said.

Neither is prison reform. Neither is immigration. Neither is education. Neither is my political journey. Neither is life! But when it comes to voting, let us vote in a very binary way: ALL BLUE.

Harris is racking up all kinds of support. She’s raised millions on top of the millions she’s inheriting from Biden’s campaign funds. The Obamas endorsed her and over the past few days, my social media filled with renewed democratic hope. I felt hope with Obama, I felt hope when Gorman read her poem, and I feel hope for Kamala.

My family supports Kamala, too. We have a goldfish named after her, for crying out loud. Actually, the fish’s name is Vice President-elect because when we got the goldfish, Harris was still the vice president-elect.

Stretching the binary

A couple days ago, I heard Kamala say her platform will be about the middle class and abortion rights. Fine, but I want to point out that she used the word “binary” when she talked about war. If she sees that war is not a binary issue, she probably sees that nothing is! I believe her nuanced and intentional use of the word is a signal to how she’ll inform and include everyone in our country. I am so sick of the Republican “there are only two genders” hate speech and insipid DEI comments.

Oh please let Kamala win.

What I want for prison reform

Nobody asked, but I’d like carceral life to include weekly nature hikes, pet ownership, access to good libraries and music instruments, performance opportunities, and daily trust-building exercises. It’s what I want, not what I expect.

I’m not riled up. I just thought I’d put it out there.

In conclusion

Most of the time, I’m riled up. I’ve spoken with many a friend and family member about this. Alas, I remain…riled up.

Thank you for reading. Vote Blue! -Connie

*None of us in theatre pronounce it “theatuh” but blogging…it riles me up.

Photo Credit: Vice President-elect is the goldfish closest to the surface of the water.

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Election 2024 – Vote Blue!

Fatty’s shorty

Bloganuary writing prompt
What do you complain about the most?
View all responses

For as long as I can remember, I have gained weight every winter. I usually lose it in the spring and summer, but once it starts to cool off, I pack on the pounds.

A few nights ago I asked my husband Jesse, “How much weight can I gain before you stop loving me?”

“I won’t stop loving you, Connie.”

“You sure?” I asked. “It’s getting pretty bad.”

“I’m sure.”

“We have months to go before it’s warm again.”

“I’m sure.”

***

And of course he won’t stop loving me and I won’t stop loving him.

***

When you are lucky enough to love — and be loved — unconditionally, it’s unnecessary to spend even one second publicly complaining.

***

Jesse and I are headed to Tuesdays@9 so I only had a few minutes to write a shorty tonight. Thanks for reading a blog post I will resist calling “Fatty’s Shorty.”

-Connie

P.S. The photo is from the holiday show at Tuesdays@9 Chicago when I played Santa. No padding needed for my costume!

P.P.S. I couldn’t resist.

He won’t believe it, not even in heaven

Bloganuary writing prompt
What are your favorite sports to watch and play?
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The morning after the Cubs won the 2016 World Series, I saw my neighbor in his front yard. I was neatening my little library and he was walking toward his car which was parked on the street. It was unusual for his car to be there. He usually parks in his driveway, which has a “Cubs Fan Only” sign in it.

“You must be in a pretty good mood today,” I said to him.

He crossed over to me and said, “I am.” He was smiling and looked joyous.

He shared with me me how he had “watched” the game with his adult daughters over the phone and how stressful and fun it was. He told me how happy they all were when the Cubs won. He was still smiling.

“I picked up a few extra copies of the paper this morning,” he said as he patted the newspaper that was tucked under his arm.

He told me he was on his way to meet his brother at their dad’s gravesite. He unfurled his newspaper. It had CUBS WIN plastered across the front page.

“I’m going to leave this for my dad,” he said. “He won’t believe it, not even in heaven.” And off he went.

I loved that moment, but I don’t watch or play sports or necessarily believe in heaven. But I love it when my friends’ and families’ teams win.

Thanks for reading. -Connie

P.S. I live in Rockford have been commuting weekly to Chicago for several years. It was fun to see the city skyline light up in different ways to support their team during the games.

Even though we ain’t got arrears and monies, I’m still in love with you, honey

Bloganuary writing prompt
What would you do if you won the lottery?
View all responses

In 8th grade, we read The Lottery by Shirley Jackson in English class. We watched the film, too. Reading the short story, seeing the film and, several years later, reading the Brainerd Duffield play, still feels like a literary win to me. It is one of those rare stories that is excellent on the page, on the stage and on the screen. I just asked my two youngest kids if they’ve read it and they shook there heads. I texted Sam and he said “no.” Jocelyn is at college but I’m pretty sure she hasn’t either. How did I let this happen? Note to self: Show kids The Lottery during Spring Break.

***

At Cornell College, where I went to college, there was a dorm lottery every year. If your number was drawn, you and your roommate(s) could pick whatever dorm you wanted. Some dorms, especially in the old Victorian houses, were more spacious than others, so if your number was called, you could nab one of the nicer rooms. My friends Ishanee, Betsy and Mona won this lottery and lived in the sprawling “attic” in Rood House. I lived in the same “house” but in a different dorm but was over there all the time. It felt like my win because they were awesome theatre friends and we had a lot of laughs. After every rehearsal or performance or class or whatever, we’d meet in their room and talk it over. More than 30 years later, I still need to “deconstruct” after every rehearsal, reading and performance.

***

And there was that lottery with the Minnesota Fringe Festival. In the early aughts, so many people would want to perform, the administration was forced to draw names to see who could participate. I was one of the winners! My name was drawn and my four short plays The Rub, The Catholic, The Mason Jar and Mother’s Nature were part of the 2002 Minnesota Fringe Festival. This blog post’s “featured image” is a cast photo. Can you find Jesse in there? He still has that t-shirt.

Two Bonus Lottery-like Wins

In 2003, I unexpectedly received a check for $450.00 It was a state tax return and to this day, I have no idea why I got it. I thought it was a mistake and made several calls to verify the veracity of this windfall. Once I knew it was true, I got a manicure at the Mall of America in Bloomington, Minnesota and bought new work wardrobe from Old Navy, also located at the Mall of America. Do I know how to have a good time or what?

In 2004, I had a day job at Coldwell Banker Burnett. After working there for several months, I was promoted from receptionist to listing coordinator, probably because of my sharp business wardrobe. A few weeks into my new position, I received a paycheck that was a few hundred dollars higher than what I was supposed to receive. I talked to my boss Roberta about it. I was sure she’d tell me I have to give it back but she said something about things being in “arrears.” Later, she verified that “monies” from my first paychecks had been in some type of holding and now were deposited into my bank account because I had a new position. I couldn’t believe my good fortune! Why did God love me so much? This was definitely a win but I still don’t know what “arrears” or “monies” are.

***

There haves many lottery and lottery-like wins in my life and it stands to reason there will be a few more and that’s more than enough for me.

Thanks for reading! -Connie

P.S. Verify the veracity? There has to be a better way to say that, but I have to go.

Push it, leisurely

Bloganuary writing prompt
What do you enjoy doing most in your leisure time?
View all responses

I like figuring out what happens when I push all the buttons.

WordPress has all sorts of buttons I can insert into my blog but not a lot of instruction so I learn by trial and error.

(1) I started inserting the “Subscribe” button. If you enter your email, then my blog post goes directly to your inbox.

(2) A few days ago, I inserted a poll into my post Poll-lease come up with a fresh prompt. I instantly became addicted with the poll results. What can I say? I like engagement! Here’s another one.

(3) Event Countdowns make me not want to participate. They also remind me that my brain naturally remembers stupid dates.

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My Ex-Boyfriend’s Son’s Birthday!

Mind you, this was not a serious boyfriend. It was a fling that lasted a few weeks in the 90s. A blip. A flash in the pan. But every year on the fifth of February, I remember my ex-boyfriend’s son’s birthday. Why?

(4) Here’s a “rate button.” (Located below picture of Barbara.) Please give the expression on my dog’s face a five-star rating.

Barbara

Rating: 5 out of 5.

Edited: The rating button does not work. Here’s a “thumbs” option instead. Click the thumb that best expresses your opinion of the expression on Barbara’s face:

(5) This is a “carousel,” apparently. Click an arrow and it will take you round and round my most recent blog posts. Is this merry-go-round fun or does it make you wanna barf?

(6) Often, playbills will include a timeline of plays that are historical or implement time travel or a combination of the two. I used to love studying these timelines.

THINGS CONNIE REMEMBERS BECAUSE OF TIMELINES IN PLAYBILLS

  • 1937 – Tom Stoppard is born in Czechoslovakia.

  • 2024 – Realizes the only reason she remembers that detail is because she co-wrote the playbill timeline for Arcadia by Tom Stoppard when she was the “assistant to the dramaturg.” Damn. Assistant to the dramaturg? Realizes that’s kind of pathetic. However, the assistant to the dramaturg loved the play so much she was willing to do anything for it.

  • 2019 – Immediately resented having to scan QR codes instead of playbills when going to see live theatre. Wondered, “Am I a Karen?”

  • 2024 – Decided inserting timelines into playbills is a silly but necessary part of producing and marketing certain genres and sub-genres of theatre.

  • 2024 – Still prefers playbills to QR codes but will accept QR codes as a supplement. Does not see herself as anti-environment or a Karen.

  • 2024 – Still considers Tom Stoppard her favorite playwright. Still loves Arcadia.

(7) You can also insert verse or a pull-quote.

From the song “Push It” by Salt-N-Pepa

Yo, yo, yo, yo, baby-pop
Yeah, you! Come here, gimme a kiss
Better make it fast or else I’m gonna get pissed
Can’t you hear the music pumping hard? Like I wish you would
Now push it

(8) This is a “featured image.” That means WordPress cannot use one of their photos for your blog. This image of my dog napping while a squirrel scurries by, even though it has nothing to do with today’s blog post, will show up on the WordPress reader and everywhere else. The difference between a “featured image” and a regular image is I cannot insert a caption with the featured image.

(9) I am also experimenting with the “category” button. Today’s the first day I assigned this the “bloganuary” category. I wonder what will happen!

There are dozens of other “buttons” but I am out of leisure time. Thanks for reading and letting me experiment with the buttons! Now it’s time for me to publish and see if any of them work! -Connie

Seven free (or low-cost) things I do every week for fun

Bloganuary writing prompt
List five things you do for fun.
View all responses
Witch-adjacent woman waits for Aldi to open during an ice storm. What fun!

Hike. I love hiking in northern Illinois. It doesn’t matter if I’m alone, with the Rockford Fringe, or with my family — it’s always marvelous. But I love hiking out of town (or state) even more. I frequently daydream about where I get to hike next.

Blog. It’s good writing practice and always takes me on new paths of truth. Blogging is like hiking for the mind.

Mushrooms. Foraging for choice mushrooms brings gladness to my heart every single time. I also love cooking ’em up!

Witchcraft. I started reading about witchcraft several years ago when a friend of mine asked me rather seriously, “Are you a witch?” I was like, “Uhhh, no….” He patiently pointed out that I love nature and the outdoors and gave off a certain vibe and should look into it. I don’t usually like being mansplained, but I trusted him enough to read up on the subject and very quickly understood what he was implying. Witchcraft isn’t as scary as it sounds and it’s really just a new way of paying attention to the environment and each other.

If you’re curious about “witching,” here’s something simple you can do: Pay attention to whatever wild animals you see this week. Notice which one you see the most. That animal is trying to tell you something. Google their spiritual meaning and see if you can make sense of the message. Example: If you see several hawks this week, that can mean you are angry about something and need to work through it.

Fasting. In the spring, I fast for 19 days in solidarity with my Baha’i and Baha’i-adjacent friends. I rarely see these friends anymore so this practice helps keep me in touch with them, at least spiritually. It is fun to think of them and pray for them.

Read Romance Novels. Here’s a link to some NPR-recommended romance novels. NPR also introduced me to Emily Henry and Abby Jimenez. I’ll admit I’m a little embarrassed whenever anyone catches me reading a romance novel but the truth is these books can be a lot of fun.

Aldi. I used to detest grocery shopping but a few years ago, I decided to give Aldi a try. My whole world brightened when I discovered this small, approachable store with self-checkout. Now I look forward to shopping. I only wish I thought cooking was fun.

Math. I wrote most of today’s blog when I was in the parking lot at Aldi, waiting for it to open. I don’t usually write on my phone, but I thought I’d give it a try. As such, I wasn’t paying technical attention to what I was writing, lost count and went over the “five item maximum.” I hope you don’t call the #bloganuary police on me!

Thanks for reading. I hope you had fun! -Connie

My first spore print! Another fun thing you can do for free. Place your mushroom “gills down” on a piece of paper and let it sit overnight. In the morning, the spores will have fallen onto the paper and you will be able to properly ID your mushroom AND you’ll have a lovely piece of art!

Pop the kettle on, pet

Bloganuary writing prompt
If you could make your pet understand one thing, what would it be?
View all responses
When I pop the kettle on, I make hot cocoa, not tea.

I fell asleep watching Call the Midwife last night. For those unfamiliar, the series follows the lives of several midwives and their community in London’s East End in the 1960s.

As I was drifting off, I heard a character call another character “pet.” I was half-asleep so I don’t remember who was calling who “pet.” All I remember is it was an adult calling another adult “pet.” It sounded something like this:

“Pop the kettle on, pet.”

“Okay, love.”

I’ve noticed the midwives issue a lot of nicknames. They do not discriminate. The call babies everything from “young sir” to “old bean.” They call old women everything from “sweetie” to “old thing.” They call women who’ve just given birth “brave girl” or “good girl” or “lass” or “precious.”

If I were to witness any of these “nickname moments” in real life, I’d be equal parts suspicious and pissed. But there’s something super special about the way the midwives do it — I listen for the nicknames and love every single one, including “pet.”

***

Why do you watch the telly when you’re trying to sleep, pet? Help me understand.

When my husband is out of town, I tend to sleep with the TV on. I like to watch / listen to dramatic television series that I think are perfectly written. Call the Midwife is one example. Mad Men is another. The Queen’s Gambit is also excellent. I was born in the 60s and am naturally drawn to the decade. Also, I cling to an absurd hope that listening to good television writing while I sleep will help me write better.

***

Why do you write this blog, pet? Help me understand.

I cling to an absurd hope that blogging will help me write better.

***

How do you feel about being called pet, pet? Help me understand.

In my imagination, I like it. In real life, I don’t. So I let the voice inside my head call me pet, but no probably one else.

***

Not a lot of time to write today. Thank you for reading. Do you like nicknames? -Connie